The pain to abstain

While browsing a baby community board, I noticed a woman's post, wondering why so many other woman on the board were unwilling to make healthy sacrifices for their unborn children.  True, many others on the board admit to continuing to smoke and drink alcohol.  The woman who posted about this wondered very politely why moms weren't abstaining for the sake of their precious babies, for even the finite period of 9 months.  Let's just say she took A LOT of heat for her post.  Other moms wrote in very defensively and rudely and verbally lashed her up one side and down the other.  I don't reply to posts very often, but felt moved to do so on this one.  I told the original poster that I agreed with her.  One of the others defended her position by stating that she usually smokes 2 packs a day and was down to 5 cigarettes.  It seems she was rather proud of herself.  Another said she 'only' drinks 1 glass of wine per week and that is done in other countries all the time, without ill effects.  Really?!  I mean, really?  

Oh my, how easy it is for some people to rationalize their wants.  In church we have been talking about "the pain to abstain".  Yes, sometimes it is painful to abstain from our wants.  But when there is good reason & good cause, it is important and very worth it.  These women believe that their cigarettes and alcohol are worth taking a risk with their unborn babies' life.  And they aren't even willing to suspend their wants for just 9 months.  We live in a world now that celebrates the "all about me" lifestyle, where our wants are expected to be paramount to that of others.  

The thought makes me sick.  I choose differently.  Yes, I enjoy a glass of wine.  But my baby is far more important to me than wine. You see here in this post a photo of my hands.  My severe eczema typically only affects my feet.  This pregnancy, it has chosen my hands as well.  Holding a pen to write has caused my knuckles and fingers to crack open and bleed.  You will notice I have no rings on.  My fingers began to swell from the inflammation so badly that my last ditch effort to remove the rings was to ask Dan to cut them off.  To keep the wounds from becoming infected, I pour hydrogen peroxide on them daily after I shower. And yes, it stings, but it is effective.  Now, the pain to abstain...in my bathroom drawer lies a prescription ointment that will clear my eczema up in three days.  I have been told to use it if the benefits outweigh the risks to my unborn baby.  To which I respond:  what benefit could there possibly be that would be greater than my child?  None exists.  

The other photo you see is of a purple foot.  Mine.  It is purple from vericose veins, which I am afflicted by primarily during pregnancy...each pregnancy.  I know with each desire to conceive that if God blesses me with a healthy pregnancy, my right foot, leg, and all the way up will turn purple and ache.  In this photo, I am 24 weeks pregnant. The color and ache will increase as I get further along.  Is my comfort worth more than the child God blesses us with?  No, absolutely not.  And what about the women who choose not to abstain from their alcohol and cigarettes for the sake of their unborn babies?  I look at them & find another thing to abstain from...these community boards where selfish women demean those with a healthy perspective.  Au revoir, community boards.  I'm happy I don't belong.  And it turns out the "pain to abstain" often isn't that painful at all.  It's all just perspective.